$150 Million Noah’s Ark Theme Park – Will there be Giants?

Ark Encounter
The Bible-believin’ folk behind Kentucky’s Creation Museum are proposing a second theme park – one which includes a fully reconstructed Noah’s Ark, and which will cost a forecasted $150 million to construct (see reports in the NewYork Times, Daily Mail, and Zwinglius Redivivus).

If you're as thick as one, you can donate a plank to Kentucky's reconstruction of Noah's Ark!

If you're as thick as one, you can donate a plank to Kentucky's reconstruction of Noah's Ark

The theme park, to be called Ark Encounter, is also aiming to gather $25m donations from the public. Yet, before I spend $1000 to donate a plank to the proposed theme-park, I want to be dang sure it’s going to have Giants. Heck, I’m going to demand Giants, even if I’m only donating $100 for a wooden peg.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m pleased with their attention to detail, and in particular that founding group Answers in Genesis are intending to include unicorns at the theme park:

The biblical unicorn was a real animal, not an imaginary creature. … The absence of a unicorn in the modern world should not cause us to doubt its past existence. (Think of the dodo bird. It does not exist today, but we do not doubt that it existed in the past.). … To think of the biblical unicorn as a fantasy animal is to demean God’s Word, which is true in every detail.

But I can’t see anything in the press releases about the Giants, who as the Bible clearly states were doing their Giant thing just before Yahweh decided to send the flood. Does Answers in Genesis really believe that God’s Word is true in every detail? Then why no mention of Giants?!

Clearly this called for some affirmative action, and I have sent an email:

Dear Answers in Genesis,

I recently heard a news report of the fine work you people are doing in bringing the truth of God’s Word to the good people of America, with a reconstruction of Noah’s Ark, as described in Genesis 6-9. I am interested in making a substantial donation to this excellent project. But before I do, I have one small concern that you may very quickly be able to clear up for me. I read through your press releases abut your bold defense of the literal truth of the flood and its circumstances. But I heard nothing about Giants, or the Nephilim, who as is clear from Genesis 6:4-7 were one of the evils which prompted God to bring the worldwide (not just local!) flood. I have made it something of a life-long hobby to conduct research into the Nephilim (also Rephaim, Anakim, etc), so am very interested in this particular topic.

Please could you confirm whether there will be Giants at Ark Encounter, and stipulate exactly what roles you forsee they will play within the park. I greatly appreciate you taking the time to reply.

If I receive a reply, then I can assure my faithful blog readers (including two subscribers, of whom I haven’t so much requested a wooden peg donation, let alone a plank) that they will be the first to know!


Filed under Genesis 6.1-4, Nephilim, Theme Parks

7 responses to “$150 Million Noah’s Ark Theme Park – Will there be Giants?

  1. steph

    I don’t want a plank or a peg but I want someone to fix my subscriber thing so I too can have instant updates on giants – oh what a joy … you write very fantastical emails. I know they’ll take it perfectly literally too.


    • Tyrone Slothrop

      I don’t know how people subscribe, but I get email notifications telling me that they are. Emma might provide you with instructions.


  2. Emma

    But will the unicorn become the Narwhal as indicated in children’s Bibles, or will the unicorn’s die-out because Noah used the horn (while still attached to said unicorn) to defile and punish the women in his family, as in Timothy Findley’s ‘Not Wanted on the Voyage’? One simply cannot have unicorns wandering around without explanation about their demise!


  3. Jim

    after i posted that i got an email from the project’s head, inviting me and my family up to take a look… for free.

    i just might do it.


  4. Pingback: Campaign for Giants at Ark Encounter Theme Park Gains Momentum | Remnant of Giants

  5. Pingback: Dragons and Unicorns in the Ark Park #facepalm | Unsettled Christianity

  6. Pingback: Sunday Funnies: Welcome to Jubilee Land, a Second Temple Judaism Theme Park | Political Jesus

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